Friday, October 3, 2008

Missing you


I looked at the old oak tree through my window as my left hand touches the emptiness beside me on my bed. I can no longer feel my heart as the disappointment once again kills me. This morning like every morning brings me hope only to leave me with loneliness. I reach for my glasses and drag myself out of bed. Still..... a part of me wishes I never got up.

"You taught me love. You showed me love. But you never showed nor taught me how to stop."

This day is like every other day. Waking up is like a curse. The sun is no longer as bright as it used to be. Nothing is. Yet so much has happened lately.

I have finished composing our song “Hestia”, a beautiful duet piano piece that you would love. It is soft and sweet as you are. My hope is that one day there will be two people that can play it and share the love that we had.

I have done some renovations around the house but I have kept our room the same way it was. The greenhouse is completed, filled with your favourite lilies that I have grown. Yes, I have become quite good with flowers. I talk to them like I am talking to you now.

My dear, I live my life together with yours. I have tried to learn and do everything you wanted to do. But I have aged and is running out of time. My hair, what is remaining, is mostly white. They remind me that time still moves on even if my heart doesn’t. My eyes are growing weak and soon, they will be gone. But they do not matter, I do not need eyes to remember how beautiful you are, to see you. I can still hear you calling me every morning and putting me to sleep every night. It is easy because you have always been by my side and in my heart.

My love, you can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. Remember the old oak tree outside our home? We once stood there and dreamed of a home, our home. We have once kissed and cried there with tears of happiness the day our dream came true. There, you made me the happiest man when you told me I was going to be a dad. The oak tree has been our love's witness. It understands how each little thing that reminds me of you makes me miss you more.
Soon, we will be together again. I promise.

1 comment:

Poeticcrap said...

One day, when I was playing basketball and the ball ended up by an old oak tree, I just wondered how long it had been there. If it could talk, it would have so many stories to tell.