Death of the gentleman

Definition of a good man:

"The man whose conduct proceeds from good will and an acute sense of propriety, and whose self-control is equal to all emergencies; who does not make the poor man conscious of his poverty, the obscure man of his obscurity, or any man of his inferiority or deformity; who is himself humbled if necessity compels him to humble another; who does not flatter wealth, cringe before power, or boast of his own possessions or achievements; who speaks with frankness but always with sincerity and sympathy; whose deed follows his word; who thinks of the rights and feelings of others, rather than his own; and who appears well in any company, a man with whom honor is sacred and virtue safe."

~ John Walter Wayland ~

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Kudos to the death of the gentleman. Manners are overrated, replaced by efficiency nowadays. The Media make their daily outcries at the loss of cultural grace and style while the ladies (what pass for one nowadays) stick up their complaints of the extinction of good men. Meanwhile, I am left with self-evaluation on where I stand on the gauge of class and social etiquette.

Class to me represents a level of dignity. As I have observed, dignity is a scarce commodity nowadays. I mean you find yourself either in the company of street punks, corporate wolves or political asses. Neither is a paradigm fitting of class.

Now there is a reason why women love bad boys. Bad boys are rushes of adrenaline, bursts of spontaneity and surprises or just plainly they make you feel alive. Gentlemen bestow upon others respect and courtesy, but leave you feeling nothing more than a little flattered. Yet after runs and runs of bad boys, after the adrenaline runs dry and all that is left is your broken heart, you will begin to yearn for that little respect that all humans deserve. By this time, you find that good men are few and usually taken. You cry a river and curse their death, but it is all too little too late.

Good men finish last. This is no longer just a saying, this is a fact. As men realize that they are losing out to be kind, sweet and loving, many deflect to the dark side. The few that are remaining either do not have what it takes to be bad to the bone or still possess inherent self-worth and pride. This means that it is either a since of weakness or seeking a person bearing similar values.

Forgive me if I am singing a little self praise. I will admit I have done my share of regrettable mistakes in my limited relationships which I constantly wish I can do over. Many a times, I still let my desires take the better of me only to recover in the nick of time. If I am a gentleman, I am by no means a typical one; I have forgone on many of the superficial manners which would otherwise make me hypocritical. In other words, I try to show respect not necessarily in traditional ways. Some may disapprove of my standards but who ever said respect is one thing and not another? Regardless, I am content to carry myself with a certain self respect and confidence which I hope I can transcend upon others. If all else fails, my conscience is still there to keep me in line. Maybe, that is enough to consider myself as a gentleman.

So my distinguished ladies, if you will lend me your ears. As a close to extinct species, I ask in the greatest humbility, that you will participate in the preservation of our gentle kind. We might be an embodiment of excitement and fun, but in our defence, we will provide you with warmth of constancy, the deepest appreciation of all your qualities and a love we will carry to our graves.

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A little humor to brighten your day, a little courtesy goes a long way.

• Ladies are not ‘air heads’. They are ‘reality impaired’.


• Ladies are not ‘bad cooks’. They are ‘microwave compatible’.


• Ladies are not ‘bleached blondes’. They are ‘peroxide dependent’.


• Ladies are not ‘cold or frigid’. They are ‘thermally inaccessible’.


• Ladies are not ‘conceited’. They are ‘intimately aware of her best qualities’.


• Ladies are not ‘dumb’. They are a ‘detour off the information superhighway’.


• Ladies are not ‘too skinny’. They are ‘skeletally prominent’.


• Ladies do not ‘gain weight’. They are ‘metabolic underachievers’.


• Ladies do not ‘go shopping’. They are ‘mall fluent’.


• Ladies do not ‘hate televised sports’. They are ‘athletically ignorant’.


• Ladies do not ‘have a mustache’. They are ‘in touch with their masculine side’.


• Ladies do not ‘nag you’. They become ‘verbally repetitive’.


• Ladies do not ‘tease or flirt’. They engage in ‘artificial stimulation’.


• Ladies do not ‘wear too much makeup’. They have reached ‘cosmetic saturation’.


• Ladies do not ‘wear too much perfume’. They commit ‘fragrance abuse’.


• Ladies do not get ‘drunk or tipsy’. They get ‘chemically inconvenienced’.


• Ladies do not get ‘fat or chubby’. They achieve ‘maximum density’.


• Ladies do not want to be ‘married’. They want to lock you in ‘domestic incarceration’.


• Ladies do not wear ‘too much jewelry’. They are ‘metallically overburdened’.


• Ladies have not ‘been around’. They are ‘previously enjoyed companions’.